7 Skin Insults That Real Women Would Kindly Like People to Stop Using
Main image – Ohlamourstudio/Stocksy
Unless you naturally have the kind of skin that looks like it was custom made by a knitting circle of angels working for the Department of Perfect Skin then I can almost guarantee you will recognise the scenario below.
Picture this; you’re having a bad skin day. Your acne/rosacea/eczema is acting up, and even though you know that real skin is beautiful skin, all you want to do is slide on a baseball cap and not bump into anyone you know.
But then you do. And instead of politely ignoring what’s going on with your face, your friend/family member/co-worker decides that what would really help your mood is to comment directly on your skin.
Agreed that most people (thankfully) now know that skin shaming is never ok. And you’d hope that most people understand the connection between skin and self-esteem, and therefore how much harm a negative remark can cause.
But just in case you felt like you’re alone in ever being made to feel self-conscious, below 7 Reddit users share genuine comments they’ve received about their skin and how they made them feel.
Yep, here’s exactly what *not* to say to someone who’s having a tough time with their skin.
1. “What happened to your skin, it used to be so clear!”
The original poster in this Reddit SkincareAddiction thread shared this less-than-helpful nugget she’d received about her skin.
She added: “I KNOW FFS
“Honestly, do you think I don’t own a mirror? That I’m not looking at myself everyday, trying to figure it out and then covering myself in makeup?” That I don’t have the before pictures, the skincare I tried buying to solve it?!
“Usually I try to have a good attitude about dealing with acne and scars, and people leave it alone. But my parents ask the most ridiculous questions! No mom, I have tried to wash my face more, and it didn’t solve it.
“I try telling them not to comment, that it’s not their business, but they’re only “trying to help”! And it’s always when I’ve just gotten through a bad breakout, when I’m feeling like things are starting to go right again.”
2. “My dad and parents in law comment every freaking time we meet”
“I’m pregnant and my dad and parents in law comment every freaking time we meet. Like yes, my face and chest are still f****d up, yes I asked the doctor, no there’s nothing I can do. It’s exhausting. And then they tell me to cover up because it’s unsightly. “I can’t wear turtlenecks through the entire spring and summer!”
3. “OMG you’re so red”
“I have rosacea my whole life and yet my mother has to point out every time I have a flair up that ‘omg you’re so red’ thanks mom, and now that’s news?”
4. “Why does your face look like that”
“Every time I had a severe cystic hormonal breakouts it’s only my mother who would say something ignorant. Every single time. ‘That looks awful’ ‘Why does your face look like that’ ‘You need to do something about that’ and make icky faces like scrunching up her nose. Like my self esteem isn’t low enough lol.”
5. “Have you washed your face?”
“Have you washed your face today?” And then squints to get a better look. ????? parents say it more than hi.
It’s ragebait. Everything they say pressing my buttons. if anyone has a solution, pls share. ?
6. “Last week my mom wanted to point out how I have acne all over my face”
I started retinol and going thru the retinol uglies, last week my mom wanted to point out how I have acne all over my face even in my hairline 🙁 I was like do you actually think that someone who is as obsessed with skincare as I am wouldn’t know their OWN face!!
7. “Do you use anything for your scars?”
“I used accutane almost 2 years and my face was so bad, hormonal acne was all over my face and besides how bad it looks, it hurt REALLY bad. Since I stopped using it my skin healed and I have a very minimal skincare routine which helps me to keep my skin healthy. But still all the scars are there. I get comments like ‘do you use anything for your scars’ or ‘why are there so many scars on your skin’. But the truth is my skin is healthier than it’s ever been and it doesn’t hurt anymore even though people don’t see it.”
The takeaway
For the avoidance of doubt- and as anyone who have ever received one of the comments above will know- it is literally never ok to make negative unsolicited comments about someone’s appearance.
The connection between skin and self esteem has been well documented, and while some people may think they’re helping, there are far more constructive ways to do it.
And if you ever feel you need help, know that it’s there. Organisations like the The British Skin Foundation have a dedicated advice section for if your skin is affecting your mental health. While the American Academy of Dermatology Association has a page dedicated to raising awareness and acceptance of a series of different skin issues.
Oh, and if you think you’ve ever been guilty of using any of the phrases above, take my advice; apologise if you can, and be more mindful of the harm you could be causing when you make a throwaway remark about someone else’s appearance in future. It could make all the difference.
Get Glowing!
